Next week, we will be traveling to Columbus Ohio to scout out the area for our new home. As the weeks fly by and the date of our move approaches, I have these little revelations – little epiphanies that sometimes catch me off guard. As I sit here planning how to travel 7 hours away with the boys by myself, it hits me that I will grieve.
I am a rather sentimental person. I like to hang on to things that have special memories or special meaning to me. I remember when my family bought the table that now is in my dining room. I remember playing with my grandmother’s chairs that are also in my dining room. The hutch that contains my cookbooks has been in my life since I was 2 years old. The desk that sits in my kitchen was once at my parents house. When I think about Richmond, I have so many fond memories places and people there. It’s a part of me. I’m very happy and proud to consider myself a Richmonder. But that will soon no longer be true. As I think of this impending move, I keep thinking of when I will come back to my beloved Virginia. Race, family holidays, visiting friends – all of those things will bring me back to Virginia multiple times a year.
Or so I think and plan. But as I contemplate my 25 years of life, I recognize that I will never come back to exactly what I left. When I got married, I only move 60 miles away, but the places and friends but I held so close faded. Richmond became my home, and I have many wonderful friends in it. But I recognize that when we pack our moving truck and leave our driveway for the final time, this chapter of my life will be closed. I may come back to Richmond, and I may even come back frequently, but it will not be the same. The city will change, and I will change. It will be impossible to go back to exactly what I left.
There is grief with every new chapter of life – high school, college, marriage, new kids, getting older. Chapters that were familiar and comfortable will close, with new adventures with each fresh start.
So I will continue moving forward. I will try to continue to look forward to my new life in Ohio, but I recognize that it will probably take several years before I can consider Columbus home. I hope that I will not fight the change quite as long or as hard as I did 6 years ago. I trust in God’s plan for me and my family as we start seriously planning our next new adventure. I pray that I will be able to continue to maintain the friendships I have made over the last 6 years of my time in Richmond. I’m excited to see how God is going to work in and through us during this time, and I recognize that, like most things in life, there will be grief.
But there may also be joy.