Little revelations

Next week, we will be traveling to Columbus Ohio to scout out the area for our new home. As the weeks fly by and the date of our move approaches, I have these little revelations – little epiphanies that sometimes catch me off guard. As I sit here planning how to travel 7 hours away with the boys by myself, it hits me that I will grieve.

I am a rather sentimental person. I like to hang on to things that have special memories or special meaning to me. I remember when my family bought the table that now is in my dining room. I remember playing with my grandmother’s chairs that are also in my dining room. The hutch that contains my cookbooks has been in my life since I was 2 years old. The desk that sits in my kitchen was once at my parents house. When I think about Richmond, I have so many fond memories places and people there. It’s a part of me. I’m very happy and proud to consider myself a Richmonder. But that will soon no longer be true. As I think of this impending move, I keep thinking of when I will come back to my beloved Virginia. Race, family holidays, visiting friends – all of those things will bring me back to Virginia multiple times a year.

Or so I think and plan. But as I contemplate my 25 years of life, I recognize that I will never come back to exactly what I left. When I got married, I only move 60 miles away, but the places and friends but I held so close faded. Richmond became my home, and I have many wonderful friends in it. But I recognize that when we pack our moving truck and leave our driveway for the final time, this chapter of my life will be closed. I may come back to Richmond, and I may even come back frequently, but it will not be the same. The city will change, and I will change. It will be impossible to go back to exactly what I left.

There is grief with every new chapter of life – high school, college, marriage, new kids, getting older. Chapters that were familiar and comfortable will close, with new adventures with each fresh start.

So I will continue moving forward. I will try to continue to look forward to my new life in Ohio, but I recognize that it will probably take several years before I can consider Columbus home. I hope that I will not fight the change quite as long or as hard as I did 6 years ago. I trust in God’s plan for me and my family as we start seriously planning our next new adventure. I pray that I will be able to continue to maintain the friendships I have made over the last 6 years of my time in Richmond. I’m excited to see how God is going to work in and through us during this time, and I recognize that, like most things in life, there will be grief.

But there may also be joy.

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